WHY IT’S OK TO NOT SETTLE DOWN?

I mean, what does that even mean? Theoretically speaking, “settling down” means to get married, have kids (at least two of them!), buy a house and a car while working on a “normal”, steady (!) 9-5 office job. That’s the most common perception of this term, I think.

I’m a 26 y/o man whose passion is traveling and making videos. Settling down, for me, would be something like a prison. At least for now. I woke up, decide that I want to go to London, I buy a ticket, pack my bag, and I go. Just go. No strings attached. Having a family means that you have to plan things, and I’m not much of a planner. When do kids have a vacation? When can I take days off, when can my spouse take days off? Too much synching to do. I just don’t feel like doing that. I love my freedom. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, it’s just not for me. Sure I want to have kids one day, maybe. I don’t know. It’s not something that I have in mind any time soon and you know what? It’s perfectly fine. It is OK. Anyone who tells you that you should get married and have kids are just people who don’t understand people. They should read more, travel more, learn more. Don’t judge people just because they don’t fit your “standards”. We write our own story, we are creators and directors of our lives.
 

Does that mean that I’m never going to get married and have kids? Of course not! But WHEN and IF I decide to do that, it will be my decision. Maybe I’ll just decide to be single for the rest of my life. Maybe I will live and fall in love with someone but never have kids. Maybe I will have a surrogate. Who knows? But most importantly, who gives a shit? Just live the life, do whatever makes you happy as long as you don’t hurt nobody. Your life, your decisions.

It’s perfectly OK to not settle down because why should you? Because it’s not “normal”? Tell me, what is “normal”? Is it normal to have arranged marriages? That’s normal in India, it’s not in the rest of the world. Is it normal that women can’t show their faces in public? It is in Dubai. Is it normal to drive on the left side of the road? It’s normal in the UK, Japan…, it’s not normal in France for example. OK, that’s the law but everyone accepted it and that’s why it’s considered as “normal”. Is it normal to not settle down? Do you see where I’m going with this?

We always say: “Don’t listen to what people say!”. But we always do and always care because it’s in our nature. Happy and satisfied people will never put anybody down, they are not jealous and they are not trying to fit you in a box. If somebody is doing that to you, remember that this is “normal” to them, but it’s not normal to you. Those people are just miserable and bittered because of their poor life decisions. But you are smart and I know you will do just fine.

 

M.

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