“YEAH RIGHT, LIKE YOU ARE GOING TO MALDIVES!?”

Well, you bet I am! Went there, did absolutely nothing, got a sunburn. The end. Even though I’m not far away from the truth, I can’t just write that. Or can I? #evillaugh. Well, the Maldives islands have always been a synonym for the “paradise on Earth”, “perfect place”, “Dreamland” etc…and they are, but you have to choose your island wisely! Let’s get started!

20180107_140617.jpgI came to the airport and I remember it was hot. The temperature there is always around 30 degrees Celsius, from January to December. Sweet. I was waiting for my luggage and there I saw mine all covered in red labels as an “illegal luggage”! What? Am I smuggling people in my bag or what? What’s happening? So I took my bag and went straight to the customs. They told me that they’ve found a bottle in my bag? “So?” – I asked. What I didn’t know is that alcohol is prohibited on the Maldives! They opened my bag and yeah, I had a bottle but it was empty glass water bottle which I bought in Dubai because it was kinda fancy and I liked it. They’ve seen that my bag is not dangerous nor illegal so they’ve let me through. My bottle is safe and it’s here with me while I’m writing this post if you were wondering. Probably not.

wfef.JPGI didn’t go straight to my island because it was late at night and there was no transportation, so I went to the capital city of Maldives – Male where I stayed for one night. Don’t you ever choose Male as your ideal island where you will spend your vacation! It’s not the cleanest island and it doesn’t have beaches. It’s just not the perfect island even though people are nice and willing to help, it can be scary at night because there are all kinds of people on the street. Especially the pushy sellers who will follow you everywhere and sell you whatever. Plus, the traffic can easily kill you. Yeah, traffic is just terrible there! No rules. Just check out my vlogs, you’ll know what I’m talking about!

The next day I went to my island – Thulusdhoo. I don’t know why I chose that island. I’ve booked a hotel via booking.com. This hotel is called the “Season Paradise” and they had perfect photos on their site. I’m talking open pool on the top of the building (I know, a pool on the Maldives? Why? But it looked so nice!), next to the beautiful turquoise sea, amazing food etc… It wasn’t cheap at all but their marketing was great! I booked the room with the view, big bed, jacuzzi in the room (I know, a jacuzzi on the Maldives? Why? But it looked so nice!)…

20180103_131727_088_01When I got there, they gave me a room on the first floor and then I was a bit skeptical about my room view because I’ve seen palms in front of the hotel. They are gonna block my view and that’s kind of a big deal because I wanted it to be absolutely perfect! I went to my room and then I saw it: The palms! Blocking my view! I mean, nothing against palms but can you just not? Some other stuff didn’t work as well, such as the internet, some lights etc…so I went to the reception and ask them to change my room because I paid for a better room. I explained the situation politelymannerlyobliginglyblandly and civilly, with a smile, like “everyone can make a mistake” blah blah…and she said that they have no available rooms anymore. There are only executive rooms on the last floor. I said OK, I’ll take that one. She laughed and said: “But that’s for the executives!? You can’t get that one!”. Oh no you didn’t just say that! I got pissed off. “OK lady, now can you please call the hotel manager immediately!” I never did that in my entire life but I just don’t like being treated like a piece of shit. Long story short, I got a better room. #success

Something about islands. There are around 1.200 islands and only 200 are inhabited – public islands and resorts. I took a public island because I’ve read somewhere that, if you want to go to some other islands, it costs a fortune because resorts have these private speedboats that cost around 600 euro both ways and stuff like that. Bullshit. 20180105_131224_047_01.jpgI mean, maybe it is true and you can check that with your resort by sending them an email but the truth is, when you are in a resort, there’s absolutely no reason for you to go on some other islands because resorts have everything you need. Yeah, alcohol too! Only resorts have it! You can’t buy it in stores because it’s against the law, but resorts are apparently above the law. I stayed on a public island Thulusdhoo. And there stands this “Season Paradise” (“Paradise” my a##!) as the biggest building and the only “real” hotel. Others are just apartments, flats, motels, etc…but as I saw, some of them are muuuch better than this overpriced hotel! Cheaper, with better food and much politer staff. I know it because I drank non-alcoholic cocktails in one of them! #rehab

20180105_153619_016_01On this island, local people live there and they are extremely poor! I’ve made a vlog about that and you can check it out here. I was mind-blown because for me (and almost everybody else), the Maldives were related to rich people, luxury, money, resorts, etc… Don’t get me wrong, there are resorts that cost couple thousands of dollars per night but there is that “the other side of the Paradise” as well.

As I’m a content person, I had to come up with some action for my vlogs. I’ve rented the jet ski for the first time in my life. It cost me 100$ for one hour and it was perfect! I enjoyed it so much even though I’ve got a sunburn. Then I went to one island and I was very lucky because that was the last day someone can come to it because from tomorrow they are building a resort there. There I finally got the photo I’ve always wanted. I’ve seen it on the internet hundreds of times and I wanted it so badly! And I got it. That’s the cover photo of this post.

That’s it, folks! I highly recommend the Maldives because its sea is like from a postcard, the color is unbelievable, it’s warm and the only thing I missed there is a cold cocktail in my hand. Next time I’m choosing a resort and I will do absolutely nothing.

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Check out VLOG1, VLOG2, VLOG3 and a bonus VIDEO!

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